Read This When World Criticizes You For Being Yourself

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It Takes A Lot Of Courage To Be Yourself

In the 21st century, we all talk about keeping things real and evolved. But the truth is still far away to be discovered or just enough layers more to put the veil off.

Tell me – How many times each day do you mean to say one thing, and say another instead because you’re worried about what others might think?
Or how often do you wake up in the morning with one idea in mind for what you want to accomplish, only to find yourself doing something else because of social pressures or personal anxieties?

Because it’s harder than ever to be yourself when others want you to be like others. Quite complicated, isn’t it? Distorted and twisted both on purpose and accidentally concept of humanitarian. It is society’s hypocrisy to tell you to be yourself and also that they are not liking the version of you being yourself.

Picasso described it just so well:

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.
Since childhood, we are taught to think and behave like everyone else. We are warned that if we make an attempt to be different from our peers, or stand out from the crowd, people will not accept us and we will stay alone. Drop by drop, these messages kill our desire to be ourselves and we seek out our safe and comfortable place under the shelter of majority.

Though most of us are doing a great job in shutting down the originality that lies deep within us and that is what makes humans miserable. We act like this because we have come to believe that this is the most practical, effective way to go through life with as little pain and discomfort as possible. But remember without a doubt, on your way to show up with your true self, you will inevitably encounter people who just will not be able to understand you. Yes, some will harshly criticize you and others will make fun of you.

Why?
Because such people are not brave enough to express their own originality and it makes them miserable to see someone else doing this. Yes, it takes a lot of courage to be yourself, copying others is way too easier. Consequently, you will inevitably meet people, who will try to tear you down just because you have made a choice to embrace your authentic self.

My answer to such people is:
In the world full of copycats the expression “You are weird” is a compliment to me. Pay it often! Thanks.

Therefore focus on yourself, and don’t get lost in other people. Because the truth is sometimes you have to do what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else. Believe in yourself, you’re braver than you think, more talented than you know, and capable of more than you imagine.

If they don’t like you for being yourself, be yourself even more.

Keep loving yourself.

Mini Humans – Poetic Chaos.

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Twilight Murkiness!

In the turning of twilight
In the shadows of moonlight

I know I can do far better than this
Is what I think night after night

Surrounded by humongous walls
Suffocating enough to slaughter my dreams

The heat is on
The pressure is high

With door and windows sealed
I’m hoping my poor soul shall be healed

A voice inside me yells
Upon the emptiness – a knell

But for the very first time in my life
I felt at a loss for words inside

Some days
I feel everything at once

Other days
I feel nothing at all

I don’t know what’s worse;
Drowning beneath the waves
Or dying from thirst

So I try and drink my emotions
Till I feel my heart frozen

I know,
Insidious is a blind inception
What’s reality with all these questions?

The trust in dreams &
Tempting desires

The silence in heart &
Broken wings

Smile hiding tears &
Laugh hiding screams

Disguise face &
Lost soul

It’s been like this for years
Things aren’t as they seem

It all looks like poetry to me
With music that’s about to flee

What matters you unheeding throng?
They cannot feel my spirit’s spell

Since life is sweet and love is long
I sing my song, and all is well
Come clear the nets of wrong and right
Laugh, heart, again in the grey light

So you see the mysteries in twilight
They’re turning away from darkness to light

Men and Masculinity – That Challenges Gender Norms.

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Hey Strong man,

Everybody knows it, but nobody talks about it. So, here I write to you and for you, consider me your inner voice. I’m trying to make an effort to reach out to your actual inner man.

Men cry.

Men breakdown.

Men have suicidal thoughts.

Men die by suicide.

Men suffer from mental illness.

It’s not unmanly to struggle.
In his book, What Men Don’t Tell Women About Business: Opening Up the Heavily Guarded Alpha Male Playbook, Christopher Flett claims men don’t often exhibit emotion “because they are taught that it is weak to do so. Men don’t cry! Or if they do, they’ll rarely admit to it. The truth is they do get emotional; they just don’t show it. Their fathers pull them aside and tell them to be two-faced: a private face they have outside of the public eye, and a public face that shows no weakness.

Does “Big boys don’t cry” and “Take it like a man” sound familiar?

In my previous blog, I wrote about the motivation for girls and that they should empower themselves mentally. https://womenwithpen.art.blog/2019/06/14/every-girl-should-read-this/ A friend of mine asked me to pen down something similar for men – laying emphasis more on psychological aspects. So, I logged in to my Instagram account and checked for some pages and hashtags for men’s community wherein I could assemble some facts and personal feelings of what men go thru and their personal experience. And sadly I couldn’t find one. Though Google provides you with many articles. That’s when a question crossed my mind that why only women are discussed and written articles about, why not anything about men and their feelings.

Well, it’s true our culture is developing for the welfare of women and their issues for equal rights as to that of men. But what is being ignored in the process is Men and Their Emotional Parameters.

Did you know that 76% of all suicides are by men, and it’s the biggest cause of death for men under 35? Did you know that men are far less likely than women to seek psychological or medical help?
All this does not happen because men are “more naturally” aggressive or violent. It happens because we teach young boys that they have to be a certain way. We teach them that certain character traits are not for them. Boys are not allowed to cry, boys are not allowed to play with dolls, boys are not allowed to like pink glitter unicorns. Children receive a constant narrative about girls being emotional princesses and boys being strong, wild, loud heroes. And of course, they grow up to become men who never learned to process their emotions properly and rather suppress them. Of course, they grow up to perform a masculinity that is not only harmful to others but mostly to themselves.
By this, I don’t mean that masculinity is a bad thing. All I am saying is that it is unhealthy for any person not to learn how to cope with emotions and suppress their feelings. Character traits and emotions should not have a gender. Gender roles are harmful to everyone, men included. And I honestly wish more men would see that, accept that feminism is not only for women and start an open and honest conversation about masculinity.

Therefore, you should know that masculinity isn’t about being emotional and it’s all about –

  • Weeping and trying to find comfort in hugs and accepting the fact that you are mentally broken.
  • Letting others see your weak side and to let go of the uneasiness and suffering by opting for an easy way.
  • Feeling happiness and sadness and accepting your emotional breakdown.
  • Shoving off the society and putting down the tag of manhood i.e. “Real Me Don’t Cry”
  • That you can unveil your emotions.

Because I Understand. We understand that whether or not you are a man or a woman, you do feel every emotion. Being strong doesn’t mean you don’t have emotions. The best people are both strong and soft! It’s that absurd idea that being emotional isn’t ‘masculine’ but that’s also not true.

So, the next time you see a little boy crying or a men who’s broke emotionally or your brother/friends suffering from mental illness or your father or uncles stressed up don’t take that shit as a manly hormone (as of what we are taught, he’s a man so he should stay strong and not weep like a woman, it’s very unmanly of him). Rather sit with them and talk about it, consolidate them of whatever the matter is, spend some time with them. Make them realize that being strong doesn’t always mean to hold on to the pain and suffer in silence. Show them that busting down the patriarchy is not only beneficial for women, it’s beneficial for men also.

Bust down this idea that it’s weak for men to seek help, or to be emotional. Bust down this idea that men have to “man up”. Allow space for men to be vulnerable. Allow the space for men to seek help.

P.s. – To every man who’s reading this, you’ve been doing excellent so far. Be a man in ethical ways. Look out for yourself and keep smiling you stunning human.

Every Girl Should Read This.

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Hey there girl,

When you feel like the world is crashing down all around you, please don’t give up. Don’t give in. Don’t shut down. I know you want to because that’s what every fiber of your being is telling you to do. That’s what seems natural to you right now. But, gorgeous girl, the world needs you. It needs your heart. It needs your personality. It needs your smile. It needs your softness. It needs your laughter. It needs your energy.

Whatever sadness is flooding your soul right this moment is only temporary. It may be deep and painful and all-consuming, but know that it will not last forever. There will come a time when you won’t be fighting back tears when you won’t feel like you’re just floating through a cloudy dream when you won’t feel like you’re in too deep to ever experience overflowing joy and excitement and love again.

I can’t promise you what the path to healing looks like, but I can promise you that there is one. And this heavy mess you’re in right now is just a stopping point on the beautiful path that’s paved especially for you. There are days filled with passion and purpose for life, flourishing relationships, innate happiness, limitless opportunities, and lots of light but, my sweet girl, you need to keep fighting in order to get there. You need to know the value and worth you bring to this world and have hope that this hardship you’re struggling with will in time loosen the tight grip it has on your heart.

And until that moment comes, be gentle with yourself. Show yourself the grace and kindness and compassion that you’ve deserved all along. Allow your soul to rest. Accept help from outstretched hands. Be proud of every step forward you take, no matter how big or small it is. And know that there are people in this world who care about you and want to see you conquer this battle you’re fighting. You are loved, gorgeous, and oh so strong.

P.s.- The girl who is hurting is hurting no more.

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay Everytime.

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Dear Strong Men & Women,

I see the pain in your smile. Hey! it’s okay if you are sad today. It’s okay if you feel your heart breaking one more time. It’s okay if you’re feeling lonely today. It’s okay if you feel like crying. It’s okay to side down the wall when it’s 3’o clock and wonder where’s life going? It’s okay to burry head in a book and let tears stream down your face. It’s okay to pray, get rid of your problems. It’s okay to bury your face in the pillow. It’s okay if the pictures of the past make you want to be with the same person again. It’s okay to feel so. It’s okay if you can’t find happiness for a moment. It’s okay if you can’t laugh with a happy heart. It’s okay if something is holding you back. It’s okay to give a break to yourself. It’s okay to not be okay.

It’s okay if you didn’t wake up with a smile today or you remember the last night and kinda feel guilty. It’s okay if you haven’t planned anything for the day yet and you are empty head today. It’s okay if the things you planned, didn’t go well. It’s okay if you are late to work. It’s okay if you are going crazy about certain things. It’s okay if you aren’t looking focused. It’s okay if the negative vibe is slipping down to you. It’s okay if you can’t find a ray of hope today. It’s okay to be in dark. It’s okay if you find yourself in the middle of nowhere. It’s okay if you fail today. And it’s okay if you are not what you thought today.

It’s okay if the other’s can’t see the actual you. It’s okay if they didn’t realize that you aren’t okay. It’s okay if you are fighting with yourself. It’s okay if like other days, people want you to be more understanding. It’s okay if you are not on their consideration list. It’s okay if people treat you different today. It’s okay if you fail to flip the good side of you. It’s okay if you are angry today. It’s okay if you feel the urge to shout today. It’s okay if you want to spend your day doing absolutely nothing. It’s okay if you want to be noisy and messy. It’s okay if you want to be YOU again.

It’s okay sunshine, breathe and hold on to that, it’ll pass. It has to. Just breathe and breathe and remind yourself of all the times in the past that you’ve felt this scared. All the times you’ve felt this anxious and overwhelmed. All the time you’ve felt this level of pain. And remind yourself of how each time you made it through.

Life has thrown so much on you and will keep doing that to eternity. But remember, Nothing is forever here. Eventually, like bad times woops away, so does the happy times. Therefore, breathe and trust that you can survive this too. Trust this struggling part of the process. It’ll bring the best out of you. And trust that as long as you don’t give up and keep pushing forward, no matter how hopeless things seem… you’ll make it. This is what brings us to the circle of life. Get along with it and you’ll see, you are enough capable to overcome the worst.

So, it’s okay if you decide to treat yourself with the real you. We should all be allowed to fall apart sometimes so that we can find ourselves all over again. Remember that there are always going to be moments where you don’t feel okay. And these moments are important. They help you to grow into a person you were always meant to become.

And when they ask you If you’re okay, it’s okay for the answer to be ‘NO.’

Being A Confident Introvert Is a Privilege.

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It’s not okay when people consider you as abnormal. How does it even matter that you are an Introvert, who is not as social as others around, who is not into too much of chits-chats and tantrums,  who believe in living on own terms, who are introspective, who stays out of public and spotlight, who choose to be quiet and into-self types or an Extrovert who prefers to be with people than being alone, who is full of life, who is friendly and outgoing makes you any different than normal. What’s the harm in being one like this?

When extroverts are considered as normal human beings and counted amongst happy go and part of life people, then why aren’t introverts treated as normal. Like people who are open and jolly are welcomed as a good company then why aren’t people who like to stay alone than with other people are acceptable? Why aren’t extroverts asked to change, why only introverts need to be less of an introvert and more of an extrovert?

This extroversion and introversion are just traits of human personality. Unlike extroverts, introverts are sometimes unfairly pegged as weird, odd and strange. According to researches, it’s being studied that extroversion and introversion is one of the most strongly hereditary transferred. And I completely belong to the introvert’s community. Every trait of being an introvert is diversely rooted in my system. You’ll see a huge difference in both but that doesn’t make anyone more or less of a normal being.

Knowing Yourself
I prefer to be alone, but I am not lonely. Yes, I’m not. Because I enjoy spending plenty of time alone.

• I have no desire to be the center of attention in front of thousands of people. Sometimes, I do crave for spotlight, but for a while.

• I feel more energetic alone, because than I can be me and don’t need to act fake.

• I often feel lonelier in a crowd than when I’m actually alone.

• I believe in privacy and no one dares to intrude on it.

• I write my thoughts rather than speaking them to someone, who in reality doesn’t even bother.

• Oh yes, I definitely avoid small talks and talking on the phone for hours isn’t my thing to pass the time.

• I have been told countless times that I am too intense and boring. Like I said, this stems from the dislikes of small talks. If it were up to me, I would have banished mindless chits-chats and philosophical discussion would be the norm.
I’d much rather sit down with someone and discuss the meaning of life or at very least exchange some real honest thoughts. Believe it or not, meaningful interactions are the introvert’s antidote to social burnouts.

• I don’t believe in parties. I am no party animals or geek. When some invites come flying in my footsteps, which includes meeting with people and making new friends – My stand is NO. Yes, I do go to parties in once a while, with people I am close to.
Alert: No intention of making new friends.

• Well, another trait I have been observing for a while in my personality is that I shut down after too much socializing. It’s more like an introvert hangover scenario. I drain too fast. I relish being alone. Though I visit the world of people, solitude and inner world will always be my home.

• I live in my head. People often complain, even people I am close to – you are so much into yourself, get out of your head, come back to earth. Well, how do I explain to them that my inner world is almost as alive and vivid as the outer one? So, I just ignore their concerns and continue living in my inner line.

• I am always accused of zoning out i.e. escape.
The perfect advantage of being an introvert sometimes is that you can distant yourself from the Chaotic world.


Some may be extroverts, some may be introverts and some might fall in between, owning characteristics of both. Whatever category you fall into just know that you should accept it and love it. Because in the end, you are a human being with different personalities.

Don’t be sorry for yourself, this will only make you feel more weak and weak. I am not sorry for who I am even if it costs me playing the role of an abnormal human for a while. But it’s worth the time for people to know that in actual I am normal like others too.

So being an Introvert is OK, no big deal. It’s the most natural part of being who you are. Be proud of who you are and own your personality like a Prince/Queen. There is no need to change or alter your personality. Your personality is the most wonderful part of who you are.


Love it, embrace it, and feel proud of it.

Love yourself because you are beautiful in all ways.

P.S. – Before tapping back on your display screen, come let’s discuss and know more about each others experiences of being an intro. or an extro. in the comments below. Let’s share our side of stories and know more about others.

Mahaveer Jayanti 17th April 2019

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Being born in a Jain family is a privilege for people like me who are not strong believers of God. Over years I have seen my family and other families worship the God, Mahavira. As of what I heard from my grandmother in my childhood days stories, events, facts, myths and summaries of our ancient history about Jainism. My family has always choosen the path which leads them to the rights of being a Jain in proper terms. And here I was struggling to arrive at any type of conclusion of what the history holds in actual. Growing up, I learned about the beliefs and devotion of our people towards Jainism. To understand what Jainism actually is and to know about it’s concept, I made every possible step to attain the knowledge required for me to draw a conclusion in order to end the doubts inside me. Here is what I learned and heard about Jainism and our the twenty-fourth tirthankara (ford-maker) who revived Jainism.

About Jainism

Jainism traditionally known as Jain Dharma, is an ancient, non-theistic, Indian religion, founded by Jina Mahavira in the 5th century BCE. Followers of Jainism are called “Jains”, a word derived from the Sanskrit word jina (victor) and suggesting the path of victory in crossing over life’s stream of rebirths through an ethical and spiritual life. Jains trace their history through a succession of 24 victorious saviours and teachers known as tirthankaras, with the first being Rishabhanatha, who according to Jain tradition lived millions of years ago, and twenty-fourth being the Mahavira around 500 BCE. We believe that Jainism is an eternal dharma with the tirthankaras guiding every cycle of the Jain cosmology.

Jain flag which represents five main vows which are small as well as great.

History of MAHAVEER JAYANTI

It’s believed that Mahavira was born in a royal kshatriya family in present-day Bihar, India. He abandoned all worldly possessions at the age of 30 and left home in pursuit of spiritual awakening, becoming an ascetic. He undertook severe fasts and bodily mortifications, meditated under the Ashoka tree, and discarded his clothes.
According to Swetambara sect the mother was believed to have seen 14 auspicious dreams. (According to Digambara sect it was 16 dreams). Astrologers interpreted these dreams and predicted that the child would be either an emperor or a Tirthankara. For over a decade, he was an ascetic, wandering about, begging for food, and wearing little. Then he found enlightenment, became a Tirthankara and taught for 30 years before his death.


Mahavira practiced intense meditation and severe austerities for 12 years, after which he is believed to have attained Kevala Jnana (omniscience). After attaining Kevala Jnana, Mahavira taught that observance of the vows of ahimsa (non-violence), satya(truth), asteya (non-stealing), brahmacharya (chastity) & aparigraha (non-attachment) is necessary for spiritual liberation. He preached for 30 years and is believed by Jains to have attained moksha in the 6th century BC. Mahavira attained nirvana (death) at the age of 72, and his body was cremated.….Jainism and Mahavira https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahavira

Why Mahaveer Jayanti Is celebrated?

LORD Mahavira was the last Tirthankara of Jainism. Mahavira Jyanati is the one of the most known festival of Jain. This is knows by others religion in all over the world. It is declared as a govt holiday in India.

Jain celebrate this occasion with very happiness and excitement. This was the day when Tirthnakar Mahavir was born. The celebration includes the following functions:

  • Puja ritual in Jain temple.
  • Chariot Festival (Rath Yatra) with Ahimsa rallies.
  • Mahamastakabhishek .
  • Arti Bhakti and performance/discussion related to life of LORD Mahavira.

Mahaveer Jayanti is listest as the most important religious holiday in Jain calenders. Every year in late March or early April, The Jains celebrates the birth of Mahavira, a contemporary of the Buddha, and the 24th and the last Tirthankara (great sages). Mahaveer Jayanti is the festival makerd with prayers and fasting.

Motive behind celebrating Mahaveer Jayanti

We celebrate mahaveer jayanti to embrace and recall his teaching of non-violence(ahimsa) and live-and-let-live( jio aur jine do) which is quite relevant in today’s time.

When bhagwan mahaveer was born, he already has 3 /5 kalyananak.

Ma trishla dreamt 14 auspicious dreams which more or less confirmed birth of 24th tirthtankar. Bhagwan Mahaveer self-contemplated and all during his adolescences gained extreme control over his mind. His preaching give us our basis of existence.

Wishing everyone Happy Mahaveer Jayanti in advance as it’s 16 days to go for the most auspicious day to arrive.

And at the end I would like you all to follow the path of non-violence and non-stealing irrespective of your religion. Because it’s the path of humanity and kindness and this Is what our country needs.

An introduction to my blog

Old Flame and Flumes

So, here we go
I have been rambling around the idea of starting a blog for almost a year now, but some kind of hindrance has always held me back. The need for the right direction and purpose can so often be a hurdle to any kind of activity and movement. I was always in search of finding a purpose, something specific, something important and interesting, as a matter of fact, I never had one.
Finally after much efforts of shrugging off the burden of personal expectations and certain boundaries I made my mind to step in a whole new territory of the internet – a last resort for writers (like me), dazed in the vicious circle of life, who have nothing but words in form of everything. Finding myself a decent corner over the internet overwhelmed me. I think it’s a sense of Atelophobhia: fear of imperfection, which kept me sidelined for such a long time. I have always feared the feeling of not being good enough for something for specific reasons, but it’s only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness we will the infinite power of our light.
Anyways, making up for the Lost times, here I come free from all the phobia and flipped them on fear. I’ll now be putting efforts to live as an example to myself – a case of women with PEN. Doing things which precisely scare me (like this).
In an attempt to explore my inner self, I will also be publishing my personal stories and experiences, short poems and tales and making you rethink what you truly are at the end of the day.
That’s it for now, until next time.

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